I almost forgot about the date when I started this post. I almost typed in 2009. It is 2010 after all. I didn't make any new years resolutions, but I did start doing a few things differently after the hubbub of the holidays were over. Seemed like a good a time as any. Usually, people eat way too much and they start a diet, or they spend too much and start to save money, things like that. Believe me, I'm aware of those things and will automatically try to corral food intake and money spending, but not because it's the next year on the calendar. Some folks are talking about it being the next decade. I won't get into that argument of whether we start counting at 2000 or 2001 or 2010 or 2011. I don't care. It must have been a lot easier for folks when it changed from 1899 to 1900. They didn't have to worry about saying twenty or two thousand before the number. It was simple. Eighteen, nineteen. Oh well, I've screwed around here long enough saying absolutely nothing of importance.
So, here's the deal. It's Ruby Tuesday. I first heard about this weekly post theme from Pagan Sphinx. The Pagan posts a lot of art. The real thing, most of the time complete with explanations. I like it as I am learning something about art and artists, their styles and their works. For me, a real learning and eye opening experience as I never paid much attention when I was in high school, and in college, when I took an art appreciation class as an elective, I didn't get it at all.
As far as the Ruby Tuesday sites go, I looked at some of them and saw that there are some great photographers out there. The author of this theme, Mary, mentions a subject, and the readers/followers post pictures with red in them, hence the name Ruby. I have been going back to Mary's site, which is entitled, by the way, Work of the Poet. I tell you, there is so much to see and read on this blogger's sites that it truly amazes me. Definitely go take a look, and maybe join in on the fun.
I see that this weeks subject is books. Well, I didn't take any pictures of no books. (Double negative on purpose for effect). But it also says to just post pictures with red in them, so that's what I'll do. I took all of these shots at one time or another. Obviously, some of them have great meaning for me in my life. As I looked through just a few of the thousands of pictures I have taken digitally, (and a few with 35mm film over the years), I came up with a few where the red in caught my own eye.
Here goes. My first attempt at Ruby Tuesday:
A natural.
Ruby red cars and ruby red clothes, the Grands out in the driveway.
New Mexican Red Chile Ristras
Hummingbird at feeder.
Painted kitchen cabinets at our old place on the California coast, circa 2003.
Team colors. Another Grand, up to bat, with a coach. Play Ball!
I'm sitting here this morning, as I usually do. It is very early morning. So early, in fact, that some folks are still up late tonight. I have sort of a routine. I check a couple of e-mail boxes I have and go to the blogs. Some days I scroll down the side bar and check out what's been going on with folks. I don't regularly stop at every blog. I may comment here and there. I must admit, I don't think hard and long about what I have just read, in some cases, and I think this has caused me to say something that might offend at times. Mea culpa.
Today, I was on my own blog page and to the right of the title is a menu bar. Along the menu bar it says, "next blog". Sometimes I click on this link and a new blog shows up. A strangers blog. One I've never seen or heard of before. Many times, it is in another language. I've seen so many. Spanish, Italian, Portuguese. Today was unique. I clicked the link and a blog about a family came up. Then, with each click, another blog of the same theme appeared. Blog after blog of family blogs complete with pictures of small children. Some of the titles were simple, like "Our Family" or "The Johnson's". Some had the byline telling of years of infertility and now triumph on the child bearing front.
I felt this strange as I went from blog to blog, all the same theme, all in English. I went back to my own blog and scrolled down to another post I had made and started my search for "next blog" again. This time, the theme was Jesus and Christianity. Some by individuals and some by ministers and some by reverends. I didn't see if there were some by Catholic priests, but there might have been. Funny how some folks throw Jesus out there like a marketplace. "Come buy this."
So, I'm wondering if Blogger has done this for a reason. If they have stereotyped or, for lack of a better word, profiled my blog, or the blogs I visit, and then guide me to these blogs if I do a random search? It seemed strange to say the least.
This post is just a phony rendition of writing as I just told you how I spent the past fifteen minutes of my life. Since it is Friday, and I haven't posted the Only the Good Friday theme in a couple of weeks, I thought of doing one, but don't have a subject today. Sometimes, I think of a subject before hand. Sometimes I go by the seat of my pants and wing it. Today I got nuthin'.
I'll tell you that I am traveling on Interstate Highway 90 and 94, through snow and ice, to Chicago today for a visit with my ailing mother. I'll be joined by my youngest daughter and Mrs. Spadoman. Mom is stable right now and seems to be feeling good. She suffers from physical ailments that won't get better.
Oh, the GhostBusters picture. Taken in downtown Chicago in the 1980's sometime. This was along Michigan Avenue in the neighborhood of Soldier's Field. We were staying in a hotel and it was parked out front. I posed for a photo op. This was long before i got entrenched in the motion picture industry. Yesterday morning, the kids and I were singing the GhostBusters song. I told them I was a GhostBuster. I then dug out the picture to show them and Man-Oh-Man were they impressed. Wish I could impress the casual blog reader like that! I love those kids so much.
Other than that, it's Winter in the North. Cold temps, snow accumulation, tax and high costs to heat the house time. I'll return and be online again on Monday. See you then. In the meantime, have a great weekend and be kind to yourselves.
A treeful of Eagles one cold day near Eleva, WI along US Highway 10.
Money, it’s a crime. We need money, and more and more of it every day to get by and keep up our “standard” of living. But what of this standard we speak of? What is that? Is it keeping up with the Joneses? Is it not ever having to go back to a cheaper brand of anything once you’ve experienced the high price spread? Is it not selling, (or not being foreclosed upon), your home and moving to a smaller place in a bad neighborhood?
They say there is no inflation. There was no COLA, (Cost Of Living Adjustment) for Social Security recipients this year, yet prices are up across the board. I remember a story about the grocery store owner in Ashland. Years ago, when there was a paper mill in full operation, business was good. When workers started using a grocery list to do their shopping, he knew times were changing. When prosperous, no one looked at prices and they purchased what they wanted. When the end of the mill was near and layoffs started, the inventory showed an increase of buyers using the lower cost generic brands and a huge decrease on gourmet items. He closed the store before it went bankrupt.
I’m on a fixed income with Social Security. Little by little, as prices go up, you don’t notice day to day, but after a while, it sinks in and when I did a little research, I see we are paying a lot of money and getting far less than we got just a short time ago, especially on a gallon of gas, a gallon of milk, a dozen eggs and a loaf of bread.
I came across this article on Beth’s Blog. I haven’t mentioned Beth in a while, but her blog is a plethora of fascinating articles every day. I call it the Liberal Reader’s Digest. Recipes, quotes by famous, and not so famous, people, words to live by and news articles about just everything. The other day, I spotted this headline:
Living paycheck to paycheck. This is a phrase I have used for years. My Dad used it. He used to say life was feast or famine. I realize that in my life, I always had a roof and a meal, but I was one paycheck away from financial disaster. That proved out when I had a heart attack at 36 years old and missed one year of work after a bypass surgery. I filed bankruptcy and lost everything, including some dignity.
I read the article. Now, I’ll comment on what I have done, or not done, as it pertains to the 10 Ways to Stretch Your Paycheck.
1) Stop buying bottled water. Americans spend a staggering amount on bottled water - $18 billion last year.
I don’t buy bottled water as a rule. I have, on occasion, when traveling, purchased a bottle or two of water, but I generally don’t. I fill large 5 gallon carboys at a natural spring and drink that water at home. I fill Nalgene bottles for when I travel or go out. I always seem to have a bottle of water in the car. Can’t save anything there.
2) Skip the Gourmet Coffee.
Hmmm, that would be tough. But my best friend owns a coffee roastery. I buy at wholesale and that is cheaper than the sale prices I’ve seen at the grocery store for Folgers or Maxwell House. Are they talking about the lattes at the coffee shop? If so, well, I must admit, I do buy an Americano just about every day and it costs me a buck sixty. I tip the great baristas at the Dish and the Spoon a quarter, so, I’m at $1.85, say four days a week, that’s $7.40.
If I drank regular coffee, it’s a little less, maybe a quarter or thirty cents cheaper. I feel like I’m paying rent on the chair I sit in for sometimes up to 2-3 hours, talking with friends. A small price to pay for entertainment. Besides, when you’re retired and have no life, I’m glad to pay for an activity and get a good cuppa joe to boot. But the bottom line is, I can stop this practice and have around $30.00 per month in my pocket, but be bored to death.
3) Buy Less Prepared Food.
I don’t buy processed food. Fresh veggies, not even frozen or canned, (maybe a few cans of tomatoes). We even make our beans from scratch in an old West Bend bean pot from the 1950’s, and I’ve started making bread on a regular basis.
4) Buy Staple Items in Bulk.
We do this. Rice, oatmeal, nuts, flour, beans, pasta. We even buy milk in bulk bags. We don’t drink milk, but the Grand kids do and they are here for breakfast a lot.
5) Clip coupons.
I clip coupons for groceries every Saturday for the following week and plan menus on the items we regularly use when they go on sale. This is meat and veggies mostly. Remember, no processed foods. I don’t buy magazines to clip coupons for other items like toilet paper or shampoo. If I bought a glossy page magazine, I would be harming the environment as well as costing me more than I’d save with the coupon.
6) Buy generics rather than brand names.
Are the contents of these two boxes of cereal really different?
I do this. I buy the “Our Family” brand rather than the name brand. There is no difference most of the time. I just bought some crispy rice cereal. It was a lot cheaper than the Kellogg’s Rice Krispies cereal. I already save here on many items.
7) Cut out dining out and take-out.
I never thought about how much we went out to eat in the past, but I know we go out far less than we used to. Can’t cut out what you don’t do. Really, I can’t remember my last restaurant meal, unless you figure the breakfast I had on my way to Chicago last month. I guess I could have brought something from home, but the savings of doing that on a seldom made trip would be negligible.
8) Go to the library. Buying books can be very expensive.
We do. I don’t buy books. I exchange them at a place or buy them at a thrift store for pennies if I buy them at all. The library is the way to go. Already in this camp.
9) Pay bills on-line. Avoid paying postage and late fees by paying your bills on-line and on time.
I do this. There are two local bills I write checks for and I save postage by bringing the bill to the utility in question. These utilities don’t have an online bill paying option.
10) Lower your monthly bills.
Easier said than done. I guess I could go to a dial-up internet service. I could save $300.00 per year. I could do without DirecTV and Sirius Radio. I give in on this one and agree that I could save some money every year. But how much of a difference will this make? Would it be worth it? Would it change my life?
To be honest, the one singular thing I can do to save money, to rid myself of an unneeded expense, would be to quit smoking cigars. I don’t like the way the cheap ones taste, so I don't buy them. The good ones are expensive, I do buy them, and even though I don’t inhale, (Sure, that’s what Bill Clinton said, and you know what he does with his cigars), I’m sure there is some good I can do for my system and pocketbook if I quit both smoking AND buying. I can certainly think of other ways I could save money as well.
There you have it. Read the article, see if you’re doing it, or what you’re doing. Maybe you don’t need to save money. Maybe you really need to save money. We’re all in a different situation, I’m sure. That brings me back to that term, Standard of Living. I guess my choices to drink a good tasting cup of coffee, smoke a good quality cigar and watch mindless sports costs me money that I could certainly use for something else. But I don’t think we’re going without things to afford the luxury of coffee and TV. That’s my opinion on my own situation. Those are my choices.
But consider this:
Everything costs money. Look at this example using the bottled water. So, you stop buying bottled water. You drink from the tap of your home. Each glass costs. In my town, you pay for how many gallons of water you use in a month, and the sewer costs are based upon how many gallons you use. If you have a well, you still pay for the electricity to power it and replacement and maintenance costs of the pump. A hand pump would cost and wear out too.
I can figure out how much an 8 ounce glass of water costs, and it’s not much, but it does cost something. How about the ratio of the cost of the house and the faucet where you get the water. Businesses run properly do this expense reporting. The cost of goods sold, the fixtures, everything is a deductible item on the tax form. Every time you use the faucet, it’s life span shortens. Replacement of the fixture can conceivably be added to the cost of each individual glass of water. The cost of the glass itself, wear and tear on said glass, replacement cost. Washing the glass after use and the detergent and once again water and sewer costs. Heating the water to wash the glass properly to avoid sickness from germs. Fuel costs to heat water, the water heater and its use and replacement. It all adds up. It all costs something.
All kinds of landfill and other environmental issues with these. That's for another day.
This is not an argument to use bottled water. Obviously water from the tap would save money over buying bottled water for all your water needs, but there are expenses involved. How about the chemicals you are drinking from your towns water purification process or if a mistake is made and water purity is compromised? Is that healthy? Can you get disease or sickness. Health care certainly costs a lot of money. Maybe bottled water is a bargain then!
A nice cool glass of water. Of course you know I drink spring water that I go get Up North from an artesian well. Not cost effective, but tastes darn good!
You can read about where and how I get my drinking water HERE
My point is that everything costs money. How do you get it, spend it, hold on to it? I’m sixty years old. I have made it through, paycheck to paycheck, for many years. There is a roof over my head, I eat regularly. Probably the biggest change that I could make that would put a few coins back into my pocket is to eat less overall. I could sustain on half of what I eat right now, therefore saving half of what food costs me to live. Half. And I’d be helping myself health wise as my diabetes is directly related to food intake.
But that’s not good strategy. If I Iive longer, it costs me more than if I died sooner, adding a burden to my already stretched out pocketbook. Maybe Pink Floyd sums it all up in the song with the same title as this post. (Lyrics below)
Money
Money, get away Get a good job with more pay And your O.K.
Money, it's a gas Grab that cash with both hands And make a stash
New car, caviar, four star daydream Think I'll buy me a football team
Money get back I'm all right Jack Keep your hands off my stack
Money, it's a hit Don't give me that Do goody good bullshit
I'm in the hi-fidelity First class traveling set And I think I need a Lear jet
(Sax and guitar solos)
Money, it's a crime Share it fairly But don't take a slice of my pie
Money, so they say Is the root of all evil Today
But if you ask for a rise It's no surprise that they're Giving none away Away Away Away Away...
"Hu Huh! I was in the right!" "Yes, absolutely in the right!" "I certainly was in the right!" "You was definitely in the right. That geezer was cruising for a bruising!" "Yeah!" "Why does anyone do anything?" "I don't know, I was really drunk at the time!" "I was just telling him, he couldn't get into number 2. He was asking Why he wasn't coming up on freely, after I was yelling and Screaming and telling him why he wasn't coming up on freely. It came as a heavy blow, but we sorted the matter out"
We have moved around quite a bit in our lives. People ask me why and I really have no answer. After all, I don’t live alone. I don’t make all the choices. Earlier on, I had a family, a spousal unit and children. Later it was just the spousal unit, (same one for over 38 years now), and myself. I guess one reason was that my middle daughter, the one who was having children of her own, was moving around the area as a young family might do to find a better place to rent or more convenience to their jobs. We just followed along to be close to the Grand children and moved closer to where they chose to live.
In 2009, last year, we purchased a home. Before that, we had been renting since 2001. This is the first home we’ve owned in eight years. I used one of the best benefits the department of Veterans Affairs gives out to Veterans, that is, the guaranteed home loan. No money down purchase of a home. I had used this before on other homes I had owned. The rule is, if you pay off the loan, you can use it again. I paid off other home loans when I sold property.
The farm field beyond the border of our back yard
The house is a single family dwelling. It is a ranch style or as they call up here in the North country, a rambler. Living room, kitchen, dining area, bedrooms and bathroom, all on one level. We like the lot our house sits on very much. There is a campus of the University of Wisconsin here in River Falls, and our lot, about a half acre, is attached to the experimental farm of said campus. This particular UW has a large agricultural department.
Morning sun streaming through the pines last Fall.
So, our back yard, beyond the chain link fence, is a farm. The lot itself is surrounded by large mature pine trees. We can’t see neighbors to the sides of our place, just that open view of the fields and trees behind us. The front is a regular neighborhood, just a few blocks to town and a convenience store, grocery, pizzeria, restaurants and other businesses.
A snowy look at the pine trees that line our yard.
The house was built in 1970. Before the first important gas embargo. Before anyone was talking about sustaining the environment. Before the price of fossil fuel for heating and generating electricity, had any importance to the middle class. The furnace in this house has a rating listed on the label as 80%. That was when it was new. Now, 39, no, 40 years later, I can’t imagine what the efficiency rating would be. Other furnaces that I have seen checked that are that old had lost 15 to 20 percent. I was a caretaker up in Ashland and remember the furnace guy coming over and doing such a check on efficiency at a rental house that I was in charge of. I’m guessing that my furnace would be rated at 60 to 65 percent efficient today.
Our neighborhood looking from the front of our home.
So, the government comes up with some plans to stimulate the economy. One of them is to invest in upgrading the heating and cooling plants in residential homes. Homes like mine that are inefficient and wasting energy. This is good for the economy because we are spending money on hard goods like furnaces and air conditioning units, most manufactured here in the USA. This alone would help in an economic recovery.
Other benefits are reduced emissions from the older equipment and cheaper operating costs. In the instance of my furnace, the savings in operation costs would pay for the new equipment in 3-4 years, not to mention the impact on the environment. The government offered $1500.00 tax credit if you replaced an old outdated inefficient furnace and air conditioning system. The manufacturer offered a rebate and the utility companies offered rebate incentives as well.
Looking for a new furnace that is more efficient, like this one.
In my situation, I would have spent $7500.00 for a new furnace, air conditioner and water heater to have them installed. I got two estimates. One was with Sears, a National company. The other was with a local heating and air conditioning contractor. The estimates were very similar and close in price. I was planning on going with the local guy, keeping the money here in the community. Keeping the local guys working. After all, this is the ultimate, in my mind, of how a stimulus plan was to work. Hire local vendors and workmen, spend your money at home. Then, they go out in turn and spend the money they make in town. And so on and so forth.
I'd also save on future heating/cooling bills, get cash back on taxes and rebates, (more money to spend on other things in the community right there), and raise the value of your home by upgrading the physical plant. Oh, and saving the environment. Probably the most important reason of all!
I’ll just go to the bank. The local small town bank where people know me. The bank that gave me the home mortgage to begin with. I don’t have $7500.00 laying around to make a big purchase, I’ll borrow it. Even paying a loan with interest would save money, just from the operational costs.
The bank tells me that I don’t have any equity in my home. I know it is a bad economy, but I don’t have equity enough to buy a new furnace that will save me money and save the environment? “These are bad economic times”, I was told. Hey, did I mention I'm putting the new furnace and air conditioning unit in my house? I'm not borrowing to go to the casino! Funny, they didn’t tell me that when I bought the house last March. I argued, but to no avail. If I were to go to another bank and they checked my credit report, they would see I asked for credit elsewhere and was refused and they could tell me that too many requests were made for credit, so, therefore, no loan for you. Money nazis.
The program for tax credit is good through 2010, December 31st next year. So, I’ll just save money or get a loan later and upgrade. This Winter, I’ll spend the money I could be saving on gas and electrical costs because I didn’t get to upgrade my furnace. Then, in the mail, I get the tax bill. This is what I will have to pay in taxes in 2010. It is based on the value the city says my house is worth. Well, it’s $25,000.00 more than I paid for the house. The same house that has no equity.
Now folks, they can’t have it both ways. They can’t tell me my house is worth less and then tax me on a value that is worth more. I talked with a city councilman I know and asked him about the procedure to lower my tax assessment. There will be a date set up for people to do just that, and it comes up later in the year. But first, I’m gonna go have a little chat with Mr. Banker and show him the tax bill.
By the way, as a good Democrat, I don’t mind paying taxes. Since this country is so great and wonderful, we should be waiting in line to pay them. We have great schools, a wonderful police and fire department, our streets are in good repair and plowed of snow quickly and efficiently and other services that make our community shine. I’ll gladly pay the taxes, but the bank needs to see that worth too. That’s where I’m coming from. You'd think I'd have an edge dealing with a small town bank as opposed to one of the larger corporate entities. That doesn't seem to make any difference so far.
Small town bank.
This will take a while I’m sure. The wheels of banking and government turn slowly, but check back with me in a couple of months and see what happens. I plan on being a squeaky wheel on this one. All I want is to save money each month on utility bills and get some cash from a rebate and stimulus program while I increase the value of my home while helping the environment, all the while, helping the locally owned bank make money on loan interest and keeping local workers and business healthy. Is that so hard to accomplish? I wonder why the economy is bad. Maybe too many rich people getting richer while the thumb of big business, banking for instance, continues to hold us down. It's $7500.00 dollars, less than 1/3 the cost of a new pick up truck. And the furnace won't rust out in five years and lose value like the truck.
Big city bank.
By the way, who is buying those trucks and cars they advertise on TV? Must be the qualified buyers as stated in the small print. I wonder how much those advertisements are adding to the cost of the same trucks and cars for those that aren’t qualified and have to pay higher interest and down payments. Funny, I thought we owned the automakers??!! Strange system this capitalism. Does anyone really know and understand how Communism or Socialism really works and how it is different from the Capitalists? Something to look in to.
Have a great year in 2010. May peace enter your life at some point.
Kinda cool, that full moon on New Years Eve, and the blue moon to boot. Two full moons in December of 2009. I thought I was going to have a fire outside in the fire pit last night in honor of that full moon. I managed to look at it, and look at the light cast over the land on the snow. That reflection made the night seem like daytime. It was beautiful.
For some, the new calendar year means a celebration. Out to party or revel with friends at one or the others home. My youngest daughter went to a party at a friend's house. the eldest went to a hockey game with her husband. We stayed home and had the Grand kids overnight. The two little ones went o sleep about 10:00 p.m. I made it to eleven. I won't know if Mrs. Spadoman and the other two stayed up to see the ball drop.
No matter if you recognize it or not, it is a new year on the calendar. Many have sent greetings of a happy and prosperous new year. I send that greeting to you all as well. And I add that your days be good for you and all you hold dear, not just for now, but for eternity.
Happy New Year and Peace and Love to all.
Oh, are we saying. "Twenty ten"? Or is it "Two Thousand ten"?
Monday morning. I have a folder in my external hard drive that is labeled just that, Monday Morning. I’d post a story on blogger and then save it to a file and put it away for safekeeping in this external hard drive. This way, I’d have these stories and comments around to create a legacy. So, long after I’m gone, the words can be printed out and put into a ring binder and the Grandchildren’s children can read about their Grand father and something of his life and his family.
Sometimes I go into that file and reference a title or a subject, look for a picture I posted or just grab one of the older stories and repost it as an archival item. These days, when reading and writing blogposts seems not so much interesting as it was, I entertain the thought of reposting old stories. I used to have a regular Monday morning feature called the Monday Mystery Tour where I would tell travel stories from my past.
I’m sorry. I have a bunch of blogs on my side bar, old friends, people I admire and respect. I don’t go to their blogs these days. I sit and want to write, but I don’t know what to write about. Lately, the exchange has been with just a couple of people. Seems like that’s all I can handle. I'm not looking for pity, I'm just explaining that I'm in a rut. And the rut has lasted a while. I'm trying to get a handle on it, it's just taking a while.
In trying to figure out where I’m suppose to go with my writing, I have come to one sure conclusion. That is, I am changing and my lifestyle is changing. During January and February in years past, I’d be on the road, traveling, headed West usually, making adventure, living life. I’m still living life, but the focus is completely different than in years past. Things have evolved and aren’t like they used to be. That is not a bad thing, it just is.
It was a great run, those traveling years. Working for the motion picture studios, criss-crossing the country, moving equipment, or just taking time between shows to head out to our second home on Humboldt Bay near Eureka, California. Driving cars or moving people from here to there, or just on the road, checking out the American life. I’d take a different road every time, one I hadn’t traveled before. I'd stop in a new to me diner or coffee shop, seeking them out in towns I've never stopped in before. It was great fun and great adventure.
I wrote the stories. Maybe I haven’t told every detail of them all, but I’ve told them. Now, they would be the repetitious banter of an old man, repeating what he said last time you saw him. That old man, that’d be me, would have the same exuberance and enthusiasm, but the story would be old and crusty, used up and not the least bit desirable. That has been happening to me lately by the way. I’ll be talking to a friend and he’ll tell me the same story he told me last time I talked to him. Every once in a while I’ll hear him say, “Did I already tell you this story?”
Then I’ll answer, “I don’t remember how it ends, go on.”
Seems like the more I dream about taking a trip these days, the more impossible it seems to be that it will happen. Money is one culprit, but also the idea that I am needed at home and this is the place that I want to be. Together with my family.
Yesterday, I spent one of the most glorious days I have had in a while. My Grand daughter Lilly stayed over night. Mrs. Spadoman had gone to work. My brother and his wife were here, but were picked up by her daughter and taken to Minnesota to visit relatives. That left me and Yoody, as I call her, a nickname from years ago that stuck.
We had a couple of errands to run. The bank drive-up window, the hardware store, the grocery. We took the slow roads, winding through the Northwestern Wisconsin countryside, looking at the snow laden hills and black tree limbs jutting out into the blue sun lit sky. Sure it was cold, but we were toasty with the heater blasting and the sun warming us through the windshield.
A picture I took early one morning recently, Lilly's silhouette against the backdrop of a gray morning.
We sang and laughed. We told stories. We ate at McDonald’s. I know, corporate thieves, unhealthy and all that. Some days, for a few minutes, it’s not about that. I sacrificed healthy eating and the corporate greediness for a portion of an hour with a child that I love unconditionally, and who loves me. For this day, any place else might not have been the same. She chose the table where we sat.
It was a special day for sure. Yoody went home last night. I’ll be alone today after Mrs. Spadoman goes to work. I think I’ll have an apple run to take care of for the food shelf, but other than that, no plans. I’ll be lonely without Yoody around. I’ll have to think about my Mom, as she is in her last days, down with my sister in Chicago.
It’s not that I didn’t think of Mom yesterday, I did. I just had the edge of the impending loss taken off a bit as Yoody and I were together. Later in the day, I talked with my sister. Earlier, I was with my brother. We all had our thoughts about the situation, and the situation is that we wait. And while we wait, life is going on.
Mom is comfortable and stable for the time being. Her lungs won’t get any better, and we don’t know how long they’ll breathe in the oxygen the machine makes for her from the ambient air in the room. After that, I turned to Yoody. She didn’t know it, but she was giving me solace.
And when I took off my shoes and laid down on the sofa, she came to my side and kissed my forehead and told me she loved me, just as I had done last week when I was with my Mom.
As much as time seemed to move so slowly for Christmas to arrive, the time flew by and Christmas is over. The children had a great time. My oldest Grand daughter said it was the best Christmas she has ever had. That's wonderful to hear, as the family spent their Christmas Eve time at our house. They started early. They were all here by 2:00 in the afternoon. The party ended early, before 10:00 p.m. Glad it did, I was able to keep my geezer hour bedtime. Christmas Day and Saturday had them visiting other relatives. I haven't seen the little rascals since Thursday night. They're coming over today and we'll spend some time getting reacquainted.
This week is no man's land for many. Not much in the way of business goes on in the workplace. The stores started buying into this after Christmas sale to market more wares and keep people shopping. There are things to be exchanged. Some stores changed policies on exchanges, giving only company scrip, instead of handing any cash back to people. In business, things are tight, just as our pocketbooks were stretched mighty thin to get through the celebrations where we bought extra fancy food and made more cookies and sweet things than anyone needed.
So, it's over for 2009. The New Year is next. personally, I don't do anything to celebrate the calendar year. Some days off of work for the spousal unit. This year, I was notified by the Social Security Administration that there was no inflation during the third quarter of 2009, therefore, there will be no cost-of-living-adjustment, (COLA). No raise for 2010 in the amount of social security I get every month. I guess they just don't come to River Falls, Wisconsin and look at the gas pumps. By the way, they're all digital now, in LED lights, changeable from the inside with a computer like console. Back in the day, I remember taking this box of twelve inch tall plastic numbers and using a long pole, rigged with an end that could grasp the plastic numbers, I would hoist them to the top of the sign to make changes in the gas prices. These convenience store clerks don't know how lucky they are to have a job where everything is done from the inside.
In my own life, I did get to visit my Mother. I left her the day before Christmas Eve, Wednesday December 23rd. On Friday morning, Christmas morning, I received a phone call and I was told my Mother was in the hospital with pneumonia. At her age, and with her illness, pulmonary fibrosis, that didn't sound too good, and it isn't. Mom is home now, but hospice care has started, and it is just a matter of when God and nature conspire to take her. As I know death is a part of life, and everyone must go, it is still a part of life that I wish I didn't have to live through.
In the meantime, I'll wait and talk with my sister, her primary care giver, for daily word on her condition. I'll be ready to travel to be at her side when I feel I need to. My life will be one of waiting and wondering. In any event, I'm stifled somewhat, dealing with life. If you don't see me around on a regular basis, I'm just busy with family matters. And as I wish and pray for a peaceful, pain and worry free courageous stand by my Mother, I wish the same for all of humanity and you, my friends.
Take care and be well. Have a very Happy New year. And have peace in your lives.
