A relationship Has Ended

Facebook. It’s part of the language. It is the flagship of social networking. I remember, and not that long ago, defending the fact that I used it and had more pleasing experiences than unpleasant ones.

I reconnected with my old high school and grade school friends and acquaintances. I got in touch and had an easy way to stay connected with long lost family members. Friends from every era of my life came and went through the Facebook profile. I could read about them and they could read about me.

Where I proudly went to High School

It’s over. I’ve had enough. Facebook has gotten the better of me already and I know that, but I’m done. Here’s the last Facebook post I wrote:

This is my last post on Facebook until, and/or if, I change my mind. If you want to contact me, use e-mail, spadoman@gmail.com
If you need my phone number, e-mail me and ask me for it. If you want me to have your e-mail and/or phone number, e-mail it to me.
Facebook has crossed the line and I don't want to be involved and exposed to it any longer. It looks like old posts and comments will remain, for now.
One of the more fabulous parts of being on Facebook has been the reconnection with many old friends and school mates. I hope to hear from you, and also hope you'll want to hear from me. Peace to all.

I really don’t want to lose contact with my friends, but I can’t allow myself the daily visits to Facebook any longer. If I search for saddlebags for my motorcycle on Google, then I see motorcycle saddlebag advertisements on my Facebook side bar. Same with anything I happen to search for. I do a lot of browsing going gaga over motorcycle parts, so I get suggestions on my side bar and in my spam mailbox on Gmail that shows me they know exactly what I’ve been looking at.

When they want me to see about home refinancing, solar windows or how to save money on my car insurance, the ad usually has a women with large augmented breasts, with extreme emphasis on the boobs, to announce the ad. I haven’t been looking at porn or looking to buy breasts on Ebay or Craigslist, but being a male, they are selling sex, just like TV does. By the way, they screwed up because they don’t really know what kind of woman makes my head turn. See ladies, it happens to men as well.

I don’t see ⅔’s of what my Facebook friends post. I see the same 10-15 people every day, over and over. I ask FB not to post the game invites, they do anyway and clutter up the other side of my page with requests to play Facebook games. I don’t want to play games. I did at one time, but didn’t want to be sitting in my chair doing the games, so I quit them all.

A popular Facebook game, Farmville

I've lost contact with many friends because they play games and that's all I see is their game moves on their status reports. They don't ever say anything personal to me, they just play the games. That is their prerogative, but if I don't care to look through pages and pages of Farmville or any other game scenarios and I block the content, I lose that friend and the contact, and the only way I can find them is to type in their name and wade through page upon page of game data.

I don’t even see the photos my spousal unit posts on her status!  If I search a friend’s name, I’ll see their page and know that time and many posts have passed and I didn’t get to see any of them. Facebook suggests who my friends should be. They suggest all kinds of things in their attempt to make money. Do you really think they can have a network this large throughout the world and not be making money? It’s the underhanded way they do it that really bothers me.

I had chosen to let them do it so I can stay in contact with my friends, play games and have a social network to belong to, but I don’t choose to any longer. If you do, I don’t judge you or do any name calling. I just accept the fact that to some, it doesn’t matter. That is a personal choice and I have made mine.

I get spam mail on my e-mail accounts from firms that have something I looked up information about on Google. I am always being harassed to give my cell phone number to them, and if I want to read most stories, I need to allow them to share my information. One time, years ago, I put my cell phone number in an ad and my cell phone bill went up by $9.99 every month. I went months before I noticed it and paid for a service I didn't want or even know I had signed up for. My blunder, I know, but to me, that is an unethical way to make money and the same as theft.

I actually have met people that have become “friends”, because they were friends with someone that I was friends with, but they don’t know me and I don’t know them. I even have one "friend" that I have been in contact with for over three years because she saw a picture of me on my motorcycle on someone else's page! And although this isn’t so bad as it broadens a person’s horizons and the idea of making a new friend is enjoyable, I find myself spending more time with people I’ve never met and don’t know as the person I do know and was excited about reconnecting with fades away in to the sunset.

No More!

I asked my friends to give me their e-mail addresses and if they want, their phone number. I’ll keep in touch when I need or want to. They can have mine and do the same. I have plenty of friends that I don’t talk to real often, but when we do talk or get together, it will be like we never had a gap of time when we didn’t have a chat. I much prefer getting an e-mail, see a text or getting a call from someone than trying to edge in a serious comment along with so many others. How about a letter on paper delivered by the US Postal Service?

Even though I’m never ashamed of what I’m saying to someone, some correspondence needs to be personal. Commenting on a funny, political or satirical photo or other posting might not be the place to ask the simple question of “How’re ya doin’?”

Facebook already has so much information on everyone. Your tendencies as to what you look at while browsing, for instance, drives the spam mail you get. Your Facebook page gathers information even when you are not on Facebook itself. They keep an eye on you. Now, with Facebook changing your e-mail to (so-and-so)@facebook.com, we’ve let them control everything in and out of our lives. This blog is a Google run deal. I’m sure the content here is used like this as well to some extent. I know there are other blog hosting sites and I’m frantically looking for one right now.

There you have it. My reasons for leaving Facebook and my lament about knowing there will be some of the great people that I know that will no longer “Poke” me or say “Hello”, “Good Morning” or “Have a Safe Trip.”

In my perfect world, I’ll get up, power on the computer and see an e-mail from someone that just wants to say Hi and let me know they’ve been thinking about me and decided to touch base. Or better yet, start a discussion about whatever it is they might want to talk about. Something in my life that they read on the blog, or something in theirs that they want to say.

I posted this essay on my blog, Round Circle. I also linked to it on my Facebook page. So, I guess the announcement about not participating on Facebook is already a lie, but I’ll risk it to let my feelings be known and in hopes of not losing years of contacts to cyberspace.

Peace to all